I cannot understand why people lash out at others when they are hurt, relationships go south and that is life. Why slash tires, break windows, damage reputations and hurt others because you are hurting. Rejection has always been part of my life and yes I have been hurt, hurt very deeply and I have lashed out but not in a damaging way.
When you love someone it is your gift to them and if they turn their back on you do not let it take you so far down you cannot recover. People need to grow in their own way and time and nothing anyone can do will change that. If the person you love is loving someone else wish them the best not the worse.
I cannot hate for very long as it can consume me and I will not be devoured by pain and the man I love, yes I do wish him and his gf the best because that is me. I want to see the world happy and if I cannot be part of his life there is nothing to be gained by wishing him an unhappy life.
He has always wanted a daughter and he even named his child that hasn’t been conceived Salina. Men have no clue that they do not decide the sex of a child, it is the woman’s body that makes that decision, so blame the woman. He may just have a daughter in the womb of his lover, who knows? Who cares? Not me.
I will continue to pray for him everyday and wish happiness and love for him but I will not shed another tear over what never happened and I will not lose sight of myself because “we” are not together. Anger is unhealthy and hate is damaging to self so why hurt yourself because someone doesn’t love you back?
I have love from God and that sees me through the darkest hours of the darkest days, I pray for peace, love and happiness for all that have left their tracks on my life and I want no harm to come to anyone in the world. My day will come when it is meant to but it hasn’t so far but I am not letting go and giving up.