I walked the beach on a chilly October morning and as my bare feet dug into the cold sand and the wind blew through my hair, my eyes teared up thinking of what could be. I could see my hand in yours and I could see your smile with mine, the world is a better place because of us.
We are a force to be reckoned with apart but together we can change the world so completely that it would be unrecognizable. We have the love for mankind and we have the love of animal and nature. We are separated only by words and distance means nothing if the heart loves another.
We lie together in each other’s arms dreaming of our future together, a life filled with quiet moments of love and life. Am I lost in my own dream? Am I lost in my own moments? Am I lost in my own life? I shall hope not and pray you are in my arms before too much longer as I need you as much as you need me.
I miss my Zeus, Athena, Apollo and Pandora so much, these four were my miniature Yorkies that my daughter gave away because she was jealous of them. I got sent to jail because I was in my deceased dad’s home, I know it doesn’t make any sense and now I am on trial Thursday for a felony.
My daughter let me sit in jail for two weeks while she found homes for my dogs. She and her brother were taken away from me during a divorce and I got the dogs for company and Athena and Apollo had puppies. Zeus is a Morkey and he was such a loving dog and I miss them so much.
Pets can help us during the hardest times in our lives especially when we are alone. I have always loved animals and have found the love I couldn’t get from people from them. I am learning to trust a rabid dog more than people, which is so sad but it is the way of our world today.
My life is so lonely, so barren and empty and it has been for over twenty years, yes I was married but even that didn’t turn out right and we were going through a divorce got back together and told three days later he would die in a month and true to form he died exactly a month to the day.
My daughter reminded me today that my birthday is next week, not that it matters because it will be another lonely day for me. I do not go out because I am a private person and feel safe in my home. I do not drink so bars have no appeal to me and being my age doesn’t give much breathing room to meet anyone my age or close.
I am a good person but that doesn’t save me from hurt or heartache and one day I will have another pair of Yorkies to put a smile on my face and love in my arms. Do you think it is sad that I get my love from pets? Do you have any idea how people in the world are like me? So many elderly or handicapped people rely on their pets for a laugh, a smile and a bit of love.
I am an unconventional women in every sense of the word but when it comes to love I am no different from anyone else. All of us need to feel love and that is what makes us whole, it’s what makes us better people and love is like the weather, it will eventually blow my way one day.
Have you ever felt like running off a mountain into the air? Wondering will I fly or will I die? Have you ever wanted to run away from your life and run away from everyone? I wonder if I will ever fly, I wonder if I will ever grab the golden ring, I wonder if I will ever be able to help those that are in need.
I want to do so much for so many but barely can take care of myself right now, that will change in time of course but in the mean time I think of how I can make homes out of box cars and use solar power to provide the homeless with housing, I want to teach the world how to make use of food so it isn’t wasted.
I want to show the world how to prevent illness, and I want to show the world how to love. There is so much hate in this world and so much anger and resentment. People should not feel this way but this is the way life is now, people are moving so fast they no longer can enjoy their lives.
I so wish I could hug the world, I so wish I could take care of those that need help the most, I am a humanitarian, I am a giver of love and hope and I feel like I am losing myself layer by layer. I am starving for the very thing I am giving to others but no one can see me as I bare my soul to the world.
I feel naked and lost, unloved, unwanted and this is so unbearable at times I crawl into myself. I feel like a shattered mirror and when I look into that mirror I can only see pieces of myself. I feel scattered and trashed, I feel too much for to long for too many and I will come together in time.
I have this dream that I can not let go of and it’s so foolish of me as I will only be let down anyway. I already know my impossible dream is just that impossible. I cannot make anyone do as I wish and I do not want to control anyone anyway, I just want my impossible dream to come alive.
I wish my impossible dream would come true, for my birthday at least. I want what I cannot have and doubt that I ever will but I still continue to dream my impossible dream. So many of us have an impossible dream am I am almost ready to give up on mine. You know what that impossible dream is?
Of course you know and only you can make it happen but will you be that loving and kind? Will you show me what I have waited so long for? Will you leave me to cry myself to sleep? Will you call me on my birthday? Of course you will call, it’s your way, why can’t you come to me? Just once, just for a few minutes, just for a moment?
He thinks of her as he gets ready to fall asleep, he wonders if she is serious this time about leaving him. He can’t seem to keep a relationship alive for long and they have been communicating for over three years, she is the one that has been there for him and helped him in his hours of need.
She loved him for himself not who others think he is, she doesn’t care if he isn’t rich, she doesn’t want diamonds and gold all she wants is some of his time she can hold. She has forgiven him his terribly dirty deeds but he still cannot see the woman inside of she. He knows how special and different she is and hopes she will wait for him.
Hoping won’t make it so only his arms around her will make it so, He doesn’t want to lose her but he isn’t ready to show himself to her. He knows she is getting tired of being lonely and he knows she will find someone to love her only. All she would like to see is him happy, does he know this?
Of course he does but does he care? Does he know she is meant to be with him? Does he not believe in fate? Of course he does, but he just is too afraid to move forward and he can no longer hope to be happy with just one. His hurt is so deep and yes he still will weep but he has to allow her to love him just for who he is.