I have learned what it feels like to be in love with someone, I know that sounds absurd but I fell in love for the first time in my adult life almost four years ago.
No, I never cheated on my husband, when I married I married until death and that’s exactly what happened. It’s hard when you do not understand the feeling of love and out of no where you are flattened onto your back like being punched and having the wind knocked out of you.
It’s a grand feeling indeed and it’s exciting and fun, love is awesome when things are going well and then you end up getting kicked in the teeth, screwed over and the more you gave the more they took. Then one day they just walk out of your life as if they never knew you at all.
That’s what I do not like about love, the cheaters, those that get someone else pregnant, those that are seeing more than one person at a time. These are the things that make me so damn scared of real love and abandoning myself to another person is really scary for me, I guess it has to do with trust.
When my daughter was thirteen I had to make the decision if she should have the gardisil shot which is supposed to fight cervical cancer. She had the shot which is done in three separate injections and the last one was the one that she passed out and snapped her jaw off her face and split up the center of her chin.
She had to have emergency surgery and I started investigating about immunizations and the compensation for each kind. I was shocked to see that gardasil was already on the list. She ended up getting a thirty thousand dollar settlement that she is going to start getting payments on her birthday.
Immunizations cause so much harm to our children and it could be avoided if the pharmaceutical company’s weren’t so damn greedy. It is so sad to see how many children have been affected by immunizations and how it has damaged them permanently.
I really like wind chimes and I could listen to them moving in the wind all day long. There is something about the sound that takes me back home. The sound reminds me of hot summer days and hummingbirds drinking their nectar and fluttering around the flowers on the bush.
I think the sound of wind chimes is so relaxing and soothing and it puts me in a relaxed mood. I just so enjoy the simple country life and the wind chimes is such a reminder of those days and it makes me feel comforted.
I love music and from morning until night I am listening to all kinds from all ethnicities and it moves me in the way I need at that time. Music can say so much by saying nothing at, you just have to listen with your eyes closed you will hear and feel the beauty of the melody.
I envision myself in my black negligee dance hand in hand with the one I love and we are swirling and twirling in my bedroom, it is so romantic, a moment I wish to hold onto even though it is nothing more than a vision. Sometimes, that is all we do have to hold onto but it gets us through.