Unknown Viewing

I think all of us have been drawn into someone by their eyes, our eyes are the window to our souls and yes you can get drawn in. Eyes come in colors and they can look dull and worn. Some people have beautiful eyes, eyes that you can just stare at because they are so pretty.

I have been told that I have “doe eyes” like an innocent doe and then others tell me my eyes draw them in and they can feel how sensual I am. I can seduce anybody easily with my voice and eyes and yes I am extremely seductive and domineering at times. Look into my and what do you see?

 

Seriously Now

People move to fast in today’s world and everyone wants everything right now and that includes relationships. I am very cautious of people and relationships because I am afraid to get hurt. “C” and I have spent time together and we talk on the phone and skype all the time.

He’s talking about Christmas and us possibly living together, I haven’t been seeing him a month and he is talking like this. I am not going to live with him, we haven’t even done the deed. Why do people feel so threatened  and think if you are married, living together or are a couple that you and every thing you do should revolve around them.

You cannot control anyone and being in a relationship doesnt  give you the right of control.  “C” is jealous of “him” which is so stupid but it is quite obvious. I told “C” that “he” said he would meet me in vegas in January and we both busted out laughing when I told him. We know that will never happen because “he” likes to play games.

The way things work out for me is I would go to vegas and he wouldn’t show of course and I would end up hurt and disappointed again and I will not let him do that to me. If he wanted to meet me he would make arrangements to do so which would be convenient for me and my safety. Who knows he might be the next one that is into white slavery or something off the wall.

WTF?

Ryan and I are watching a sci-fi flick and there are those scary parts that happen and Ryan start yelling at the guy on the tv. Come now, you know you have done this how many times? I do it all the time and when I am at the movie theatre I can hear other people doing the same thing.

Isn’t it funny  how you can watch a flick and you start telling the person on tv what to do or you are asking them, like they are going to answer. Isn’t human nature funny and isn’t it funny how we scream at a tv or in the movie theatre? Asking the movie person why are you just standing there? LOL

Quarter Bounce

I finally bought a new king size mattress for my bed. I got rid of our mattress a few days after Bob died. I just couldn’t sleep in that bed any longer. Every morning since May 10, 2003 I would put my hand on his chest to see if he was still alive.

Bob’s family has a clotting disorder and Bob would get clots quite a bit. I thought he would die from them but he died from leukemia. The mattress was to symbolic of him and it had to go. I got a new one and it is extra firm.

The mattress is so hard you can bounce a quarter off of it. Most people wouldn’t like to sleep on a mattress that hard but I have slept great for the last two nights. I haven’t woke up with back or hip pain, it’s a beautiful thing.

The next dilemma is  being very careful of  “breaking it in”. I seem to remember the first man I have been on a mattress. I do not want just anyone in my bed if you know what I mean but I can only wait so long and with “C” in my life, I don’t know if we ever will make love but the potential is definitely there.

A Letter Of Life

How do you live without being with someone you love? Do you look at pictures and old love letters? Do they remind you of where you would rather be or who you would rather be with?  Love letters are the glue that hold long distant relationships together.

Love letters say so much even when they say so little and they put a smile on our faces. If you take the time to write a love letter than the person you are writing to is pretty special. Most people don’t write letters even on the computer.

Love letters are so precious and they are the letters of life as they fill the void in our hearts when we are alone or lonely. A simple letter can say I miss you and I love you in a way even words cannot convey at times.

I wish I had someone to write me love letters without me having to tell them, but then again I am the dreamer am I not?