Terms Of Endearment

Have you ever noticed how people use terms of endearment when they really care about each other? They refer to each other as sweetie, hon, honey, asshole ect. lol. Bob and I used to call each other an asshole and then we would laugh at ourselves. It feels comforting and special when someone uses a term of endearment when they talk to me and it makes me feel like the person really does care about me. When you no longer use kind words of endearment with the person you are with then the relationship is dead.

When the words stop then that tells you that there is nothing in the fizzle left, that you may not hate the person but they no longer are held near and dear to your heart. Those words are relationship savers, they are strengtheners as well as it tells the other person that they are your number one. It’s strange how we get into this habit but all of us do it if we really feel anything for the other person and it’s normal to stop when the relationship is dieing or dead. 

The term of endearment I use a lot is hon, yep that’s my word and I’m sticking to it because I like the sound and the way it conveys my feelings about the person. The word sounds “gentle and loving” to me and it’s just a warm word to me. I like the person that I care for to know that I do care and that they mean something to me, men like that shit. There’s nothing sweeter than hearing words of endearment and I do not believe enough people are using them any longer.

The Shower

I came from outside covered in sweat and needing a shower I walked into my masterbath and turned on the water and slowly disrobed, dropping my clothes in front of the toilet as I took a piss. I walked slowly over to the shower and placed my big toe inside to feel the temperature of the water, which was perfect. I slid the sliding glass door to one side and entered the shower allowing the water to cover me from my head down and I stood there just enjoying the moment.

I took the bar of soap and rubbed it into the sponge and began to wash my arms, pits and then slowly over each breast and under both. I had my eyes closed and began to fantasize about “him” being in the shower with me, running his hands over my breasts and between my legs. As I watched myself I began to envision him standing naked in front of me as I washed his chest, balls, cock and his ass. The water rinsed him off as I slowly began to kiss his neck, ear, lips and down his chest.

I got on my knees and took his cock gently into my mouth, just a bit at a time as I cupped his balls and massaged his taint. I love showers and making love in a shower is so right, yes it is so right with the right person. He pulled me up before he could come and turned me around leaning me against the shower wall. He spread my legs and slowly entered me and he began to fuck me fast and hard making my breasts slap off the wall as he had one hand on the wall and the other pinching a nipple.

This fantasy made me so fucking hot I couldn’t keep myself from bringing myself to a roaring orgasm which left me leaning up against the wall attempting to catch my breath. I had to sit down on the shower chair as my head cleared and my senses returned. I haven’t had a fantasy this earth shaking in quite some time and can honestly say I was left breathless by a ghost, lol. It’s a good thing I have never met this man because we would be in bed for days, maybe weeks on end, lol.

Obsession

Have you ever been obsessed with someone? Wanting to know everything about them, following them online, reading every post and every comment they make? Do you ever wonder what the obsession truly is? Do you ever wonder why you don’t step up and make an attempt to meet the person? Why would anyone want to torture themselves with an obsession? It controls your mind and you constantly are thinking about this person you stalk. Do you ever think to yourself that “yes, I’m going to meet this person”Photo on 5-19-13 at 10.37 AM #6 Photo on 5-19-13 at 10.37 AM #7?Photo on 5-19-13 at 10.37 AM #8

Do you sit back and daydream about the person, wondering what their skin feels like, what their hair smells like, what they are like sexually? Do you ever wonder if you and that person are meant to be together or do you just revel in your fantasies? Do you ever think to yourself that you are just wasting away in your obsession? The problem with an obsession is you can never get the person out of your mind and they control your thoughts throughout the day and night?

Do you ever lie in bed at night and masturbate to the thought of this person? Do you do this often? This is beyond an obsession and you cannot find a healthy relationship with this person in your mind because you are so damn attracted to them and them alone. You will never ifnd anyone like them because of the fantasy you have built up in your mind and the only way to free yourself is to meet this person, experience this person and then you will see what it is you have been looking for or not.

Do you ever wonder what it would feel like to be the banana? LMAO

Photo on 5-20-13 at 11.57 AM #3

Where It Goes Wrong

I find relationships to be so damn daunting for all of us as we go through the stages of our lives and the relationship we are in. We meet, fall in love (or so we think), get married, have children and life is all good, right? Nope, this is the beginning of the end for most relationships as the kids are now taking up space in the bed, the kids always the kids needing to go here or there, they need so much that in the midst of filling their needs, we begin to lose our own needs.

Being a mother puts us in a very precarious position as there is nothing stronger than a mother’s love, a mother will do anything for her children if she is a really loving, dedicated mother. Children take the front seat and dad hits the back seat because as women we see our children as always small, needy and wanting from us. The more children the more demands and less time for the couple to rebuild, yes rebuild their relationship after the children. Men pull away from their wives without even realizing they are doing it.

They become insecure and somewhat jealous of the time their wives spend with their children and they feel neglected and begin to look at themselves as nothing more than a meal ticket, bill payer, the man who is supposed to get things done. As men slowly pull away the wife becomes closer to her children and less attracted to her husband as her needs are no longer being meet and neither are his. The distance between the two grow and eventually the distance gets to be too much and then the fights start.

Fighting over nothing, bullshit and bitching just because they no longer can actually stand the person they married. Things get really ugly usually and people do some really hateful and fucked up things to each other. Relationships do not have to be like this but more likely than not this is how they end. When going through a divorce with my husband I took the high road and tried so damn hard to approach the divorce like a business, splitting assets and other shit, always trying to be fair.

My husband on the other hand was a greedy fuck and wanted it all because I had really destroyed his ego and he thought I was just talking when I said I wanted out, wanted to be free, wanted a divorce. He trashed my name, my personal items and made my kids hate me for so long.  But I did get back with him and was there until the day he died and I wouldn’t change a thing, not a single thing because I am who I am from all of my painful experiences. I have come to a point in my life that I am getting serious about shit and moving forward and I keep on keepin’ on and I look back rarely these days.