Human beings have their own mating and dating dance as we flirt, joke, put down, insult each other. You can be attracted to someone’s personality or their looks. When we are young we instinctively look for a mate to reproduce with and when we get older past the child rearing years we look for a mate that compliments us, someone we can enjoy life with. We all desire to meet someone who makes us feel good about ourselves and it’s funny how to people interact at times.
I am currently dealing with someone who I like, ya just like this guy because he’s intelligent and easy on the eyes. It’s funny how we interact as we insult, hurt each other, joke around occasionally but there is an attraction on both sides. He is involved with someone else because he has gone through a tough divorce that really hurt his self image so he is dating a much younger woman because it makes him feel desirable and young again. He enjoys her company and the sex but even the sex has lost it’s pizzazz I have no doubt.
They have been dating at least six months and that is when two people who feel committed talk of living together to see if they can build a life together. He isn’t going to move her in because he already knows she isn’t a permanent fixture in his life. He thinks he is in a relationship but he really isn’t as she is always available for sex and jumps when he calls and of course she is seeing other guys and having sex with them. This is so typical of the older man dating the younger woman and in the back of her mind she is wanting to marry and have kids with him, which will never happen.
Men like to date a “safe” individual because they do not have to make a committment especially to a younger woman and she will still be there for him like a door mat. The difference between her and I is I already have my family, do not want to marry or need to marry again, have already done the marriage thing and I am not insecure and need to be anyone’s door mat. I believe he has fears of meeting me because I could reject him, do not want anything from him, am not impressed by his fame or what he has.
We have a very odd friendship which is riddled with attraction on both sides and he cannot stand it if he has no contact with me for a day. This alone tells me he wants to meet me but he is feeling to insecure and has such a fear of rejection that he stays in his safe relationship with this young woman. She doesn’t offer him what he really needs and no sex is not what he really needs but she gives it freely thinking this will slowly real him in. I have no doubt she is pretty and thin and has an awesome body but that alone will not keep his attention and he doesn’t see her as much as he used to as he makes excuses why he doesn’t have the time for her.
He probably has told her he isn’t seeing anyone else and his work occupies most of his time but the truth is if he wanted to be with this young girl he would make the time for her. His attraction to me will keep him from ever meeting anyone else and frankly I do not care if he is fucking this girl or not. I do not see him with this girl who much longer as the relationship has basically ran its course and he is looking for a deeper connection with another.
I believe he can relate to the many experiences I have had in my life and I know I hurt him and piss him off and he does the same to me as we are attracted to each other. I do not want to be his girlfriend as being a friend first is so important to me, someone you can trust and talk to, someone who will listen to you and you can bounce ideas off of. This is what is important to me and if you can build a great friendship, well then the rest will fall into place in its own good time.
I would think a man would want to have a woman and her friendship first before letting the sex control them and as an older woman I know the importance of great sex not the mediocre sex you get from a young woman. I would like to meet this man and laugh with him but I will not put my life on hold for him and I will not tie myself to him in hopes of a relationship. The truth is we have a relationship that is unusual at best but we do laugh at each other even if we are not aware of it at the time.
I am now taking better care of