The Broken Hearted

When someone breaks our heart they do more than just that as they break our spirit as well. We are no longer the same person and even our children see the change. Our children want to protect us and make everything better and they will do anything to see their parents happy again. My son’s heart has been broken for several years and when he lost his dad he lost himself.
We do not realize that our children become our guides and all they want is to love us, spend time with us and share themselves with us. We are broken and we try to fix ourselves with relationships that are not meaningful and our children want just us and not an intruder. We try to mend ourselves by bringing someone into our lives and we do not think about the effect that has on our children.
Children of a broken relationship give so much to us but we cannot see it for our own pain colors our world. My son is a teenager and I see the pain in his eyes, I see the loss, the emptiness and this is what happens to our children. They need us and only us to help color their world pretty again and people fool themselves and think it’s fine to bring someone new into their world but we are fools when we do that.
The loss of a relationship is devastating to our children more so than us as they lose the security they have always known and have to rely on. It’s so important to help our children rebuild as well as ourselves and we want to share our life with someone so bad we neglect to take a good look at our children and how the loss has affected them. Children lie really well and they tell us everything is fine when it isn’t fine, not one damn bit.
It takes time to heal and that includes our children and the biggest mistake we make is to bring someone into our children’s lives to soon. We need to heal somewhat first and then start over with someone else but we must remember to keep that person distant from our children for quite some time. Bringing another into the parent/child relationship to soon does more damage than we could ever imagine and our children need us and us alone for quite a while because they need to feel secure again.

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