Why do you pretend to be other people? Why do you read everything I write? Why do you look at my pictures? You must realize how much this hurts me as you refuse to talk or meet me so why are you doing this to me? Why won’t you meet me? Why won’t you talk to me? Why won’t you treat me like a real person??? Please tell me these things because you are hurting me every single day and I do not sleep well because of it.
I am asking you as one human being to another to please answer me and quit playing these games as you are destroying me, yes you are doing serious damage to me and I do not deserve this. I am hurting so bad and if you care about me one single bit then please leave my life, please let me find happiness, please let me live again. I died years ago and I am trying to rebuild myself but you are keeping me from doing just that.
Please quit being so selfish and self absorbed and leave me, please just go so I can move on as you are keeping me from moving on and living, please stop. Please understand I need to feel love again, be loved again and I do not and I am feeling terrible about myself because of your rejection. Yes you have that affect on me and I am so sad and depressed I could cry and do.
If you stay out of my life I can forget about you and focus on meeting someone who will make me complete and happy again. Do you not want to see me happy? Do you want me to be alone the rest of my life or until you meet someone that makes your world happy and completes you? Do you think this is right? fair? please, please, please, stop these games and please do not have any contact with me so I can forget you, I ask you please or do you enjoy knowing you make me cry every single day on and off all day?
FYI- Shamel will not tell you what is really going on with him because he no longer trusts you, when you brought your barmaid cunt into his life is when he lost his trust in you. You are a damn fool and think he will confide all to you but you are so damn wrong. You hurt your son more than you will ever know and he has lost so much respect for you because of your stupid actions, I do not know if he will ever trust in you again and if he does it will not be for another ten years at the minimum, proud of yourself now????? You fucking idiot what have you done, you do not even realize how you have hurt him as well as yourself and as far as me, well I cannot take this treatment any longer because it’s killing me and for Shamel, my hat is off to that boy as he is hiding his pain so well you would think life is wonderful for him and as for me well you are ripping out my heart piece by piece which is effecting my children as they do not understand why I am crying all the damn time, but then again you only care about yourself.
I hate what you have done to Shamel, unlike you I feel his pain as if it were my own you stupid fuck, I could slap you across the face for what you have done. I do not know your son but I feel every heartache and every tear that runs down that boys cheeks and yes he does cry by himself away from everyone else. He feels abandoned and he also feels as if he is in the way of you starting a new life with your cunt. He feels, well fuck it you probably dont believe me anyway, but I do know my heart aches for him and all I want to do is hug him and assure him that you will one day heal your own aching heart and will be able to love again which in turn will let you be the person you once were at least in his eyes, damn you fucking asshole you have heart that boy so badly and beyond words and spending more time with him only places a bandaid over his hurt. Hope your cunt was worth what you have lost but no doubt she was in your selfish ass eyes, what a fucking idiot!!!!!!!!!!!!