I have a couple of things that really turn me off to a person and one involves violating my privacy as I am a very private person. Don’t go in my purse, cellphone, email, wallet or anything personal of mine. I have nothing to hide and if you ask me I will gladly give you access to anything of mine. I don’t lie to people and have nothing to hide but I am a very private person.
I think everyone is entitled to their privacy and when you cross the line well I really have no respect for you as I wouldn’t violate your privacy. Another thing that is a super turn off to me is how single parents treat their kids. Your kids were a choice you made and if the marriage doesn’t work out or a spouse dies you are solely responsible for your kids and they should come first.
I do not care how lonely I get I will always be there for my children and they do come first and always will to a certain degree. Our children rely on us to be their teachers, their guides and their rock and when you start dating someone who person is usually put first before your kids from what I see. Most of the people I know put their kids second to the person that they are dating and I thing this is so wrong.
Maybe I am out of line here but i do not think you should meet anyone’s children unless you have dated them 4-6 months because you need a solid foundation with the person. Dating can be fun and exciting but don’t involve the kids until you know you want to be with that person for more than just a good time. Our children must know that they are first in our lives and when we bring someone else into the mix then we are affecting our children.
Kids are resilient but they also are the great actors and actresses of the world as they hide their disappoint and they pull away from us when they feel that they are second best. People do not realize that kids hide so much from them and so many people think their children will tell them anything and everything which is bullshit as they do not. Kids hide their pain because they want their parents to be happy but they also want to know that they are first and always will be until they have flown on their own.
I dont want my kids to meet guys I am dating because I need to have a healthy foundation built first with the person and I have to know that they will never feel as if my kids are in the way. People pretend to like your kids when they actually don’t and most people do not want anyone’s kids around because they want the person all to themselves but kids feel the same way.
I get so turned off when people don’t pay their child support or use the visitation that they have because they are half of their children and they need to teach their children well. My own father never visited me when I was a child and I know how his absence has affected my life and his excuse was he didn’t want to deal with my mother. The truth is he didn’t like kids even though he didn’t mind the creation process.
It’s important to have both parents in our lives as we learn from the feminine/masculine ways both parents bring to the table and having both parents involved in our lives is what shapes us as people. No parent is perfect but our children pick up so much from us and we teach them how to be productive adults and hopefully good people in society. A person that denies that they have a child or has given that child up should divulge that information to the person they are involved with because you never know when that child may come knocking on your door and it says volumes about your character when you do not lay that information on the table.
My husband lied to me about a child he had and gave up to his x-wife and I lost so much respect for him because he did lie about it. He denied me the right to make my own judgement of the situation and all he wanted was what I had and he wasn’t going to risk losing it over something that had happened in his past. I got so pissed when my step daughter told me about Robbie because it explained why he didn’t want my son to be name Robert after his dad.
That piece of information just something down inside of me and I never felt the same about my husband after that. He just didn’t get it that lieing about something so important really affected me. He talked me out of going with him to get our marriage license because he knew that how may marriages is documented and you see that information when you remarry. He neglected to tell me how many times he actually had been married because once again he didn’t want to lose a woman who worked her ass off and he didn’t have to provide for but instead could take from.