The White Dress

My daughter is like every other girl her age as she enjoys watching shows about weddings and the rich and famous. She cracks me up as she puts down the girls that are getting married, she makes fun of their color choices, makeup choices, venue and food choices. I have to give her credit because she is very good at makeup and applying it properly and she dresses very well and has great sense of color and design.

She dreams of a beautiful wedding like most girls do and she is picking things out of the tv weddings for her own wedding. She wants me to walk her down the aisle and I hope things are better financially for me when she finally does take the plunge. I never had a wedding, nope it was justice of the peace for me which was another let down in my life as I wanted a beautiful wedding as well but that is how my cards fall, always the joker facing up laughing at me.

She likes to watch the housewives of orange county and miami and she makes me watch that shit with her. Those woman are so fake and you can tell everyone that has had a boob job or face work done. These women have nothing better to do than to out do each other by purchasing berkin bags which are outrageously expensive and I cannot see spending that kind of money on a purse.

Shelby made me watch  with her the other night and there is a very young woman getting married to an older man. She has a huge sex drive and he doesn’t care if they ever have sex. This marriage will not last because sex is so important to any relationship and he just isn’t putting out. When a man doesn’t want sex then there is a problem unless he is dog tired most men will have sex at a drop of a hat.

Im glad I dont have that type of issue because I so enjoy sex and every aspect of it, I really enjoy making love slowly and giving my partner pleasure which in turn gives me pleasure. I do not know if I will ever find that special man or if I will ever have a partner that I worship but I do so hope one day, one day soon I can wrap my arms around the man who I will spend the rest of my life with.

I do not care if I marry again but I do want a committed relationship with someone, I want to make someone happy and they make me happy as well. I want great sex again and to laugh and hold hands again, to smile just thinking about that person . I think about someone now and he never leaves my mind and I do pray for him, his health and safety and I pray one day he will give me a chance to show him what he has been missing, I am what he has been missing and I think he knows it as well.


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