Dont

Please do not contact me anymore, you are hurting me to much and I am getting seriously depressed. If you care at all leave me be or meet me and you will not meet me. Find your happiness in someone else because I am not the woman for you or you would b with me. You do not love me and you get some kind of kick out of your games. Goodbye Gabriel and my best to you

Opacity

“Nobody sees anybody truly but all through the flaws of their own egos. That is the way we all see …each other in life. Vanity, fear, desire, competition– all such distortions within our own egos– condition our vision of those in relation to us. Add to those distortions to our own egos the corresponding distortions in the egos of others, and you see how cloudy the glass must become through which we look at each other. That’s how it is in all living relationships except when there is that rare case of two people who love intensely enough to burn through all those layers of opacity and see each other’s naked hearts.”

The Lie

I was so fooled by you

I was so taken in

I was so manipulated

I was nothing but a toy

For you

I loved you so much

Wanted nothing but

Your happiness

You through it back

In my face

Now I feel nothing

But disgrace

You do not want to be loved

You want nothing but your fame

Gathered from your name

You think you have it all?

You have nothing

You live against a wall

You are controlled

Not the controller

A fool you are

With no name

No face

No heart and

No place

A prisoner in your

Own four walls

It is time for

You to fall

A Dark Place

The mind can take you to a very dark place, a place that one can hide and deny what is true and the mind can make us do things without having any control over those actions. The mind can make us hate ourselves and feel undeserving and the mind  can make us end our pain and suffering in harmful ways.

When your life is devout of any kind of love you strive to find that love any way you can and it becomes an addiction in it’s own right. Wanting to be loved and to love is not evil nor bad in any way but it can lead us to find a barren stream and make us question our life purpose. People that lead others on and play games with emotions do not realize what damage they are doing and they can actually end up with the blood of another on their hands.

You can love so deeply that you become part of another and when you do not feel that love is returned there are times you wish to end your own pain, your own self induced agony. A troubled soul will seek peace at any cost and will do whatever it takes to quiet the aching soul and those that use words of love to control another have no idea what they are doing.

You cannot control another but you can manipulate a person and their emotions but what is the end result? End of life as the person once knew it, the end of love that the person felt and the demise of a person that only wanted to love. Sometimes, we are not meant for this world even though we have good intentions and are good people or so we may think of ourselves that way.

It is time to lie down and hold the rose to the chest and exhale for one last time, it is time to exit a world of pain that holds no happiness or truth and it is time to set sail to the beliefs that one could love and be loved. I have buried almost everyone I have ever loved but who will bury me? Who has ever loved me? NO ONE AND THAT WILL NEVER CHANGE