Find It Within

Each and every one of us is beautiful in our own unique ways and that includes myself. I have been focusing on why I have no one in my life to love me and me only when I should be focusing on what is inside myself and who I really am. I met someone today at the gym that made me realize that I am special and a good person and not like most people of today.

He reminded me what life is really about and what is really important and it has do to with the person we are inside. It has to do with morals and ethics and it has to do with self respect and liking ourselves. It’s ok not to have anyone in my life at this time because I know one day I will but it is time to focus on myself and that is what I am doing.

I havent smoked in almost two weeks and I work out everyday and Im feeling better physically. I have an appointment with my surgeon next Thursday to look at this torn rotor cuff and Im going to schedule surgery. I cannot do any weight training with my upper body until I get the surgery so Im finally going to bite the bullet.

I had a surprising call this morning from “C” and I havent heard from him in a long time, he wants to take me to dinner and he wants to talk. I have no idea what is on his mind but when someone comes to me and wishes to talk I will always listen even when I am mad at the person. He is very attractive in many ways but also ugly at the same time so we shall see what he has been up to.

I do miss lieing in bed naked with him and just talking and the feel of his body is so arousing but I would never have sex with him for the sake of an orgasm. I really like running my hand over his chest and down to his waist because his skin is so soft and I like the feel of his muscles and I do like his kisses, and yes he can kiss!!!

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