To Grow Apart

When two people no longer are growing together they grow so far apart that they no longer have mutual respect and they just avoid being together at all costs. There are so many people who are married yet live separate lives which makes them strangers over time. Some people stay married regardless of how unhappy they are because they do not want to feel like a failure or have others look at them as failures, which they are not.

So many people thought I had the perfect marriage and there was only one person that knew how unhappy I truly was and she never looked down on but supported me instead. When I finally did file for divorce things got beyond terrible and my husband did things to me that you wouldn’t do to your worse enemy. He painted me to be the cheating wife, which I was not but it made him feel better to believe there was another man to accept that he was not being the husband that fulfilled me.

I stayed in the relationship for the kids and the security but eventually neither was a good reason to stay and be so miserable. I was the good wife for as long as I could be but walking away is when I could breathe again and be myself. It’s nice when you have someone who cares about you and you alone and it’s nice to build a life with someone who shares your interests and wants to experience new things with you but I didn’t have that in my marriage.

It’s so damn hard to look at your life and analyze it for what it is and accept what isn’t making you happy and what you have to do to change it. It’s not easy walking away from someone who you have spent so many years with, raising children and building a life together. Once you do separate or divorce the real person comes out and there is always one party that wants to hurt the other party and will do and say anything to achieve that.

When your partner acts like that you look at that person in a completely different light and you no longer have the same respect for them. You long for someone to love you, spend time with you and just make you laugh again and to live again. Happiness is out there for each and everyone of us but sometimes some of us do not have that happiness come to us as quickly as we may like and I believe that is because we need to change ourselves, our lives and we need to learn and grow and when we reach a new plateau that is when the true love our life comes to us.

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