The Beginning

Most people start their lives together at their wedding but I didn’t have a wedding because I was older and pregnant. A wedding should be beautiful and it should make the bride and groom want to be with each other even more so. I think the wedding night should be super special but of course mine wasn’t as we had pizza and I puked that up because of morning sickness that went all day and night.

I do not know if I will ever remarry again and I do not know if I will ever have a wedding or not and its just another let down  of my life. I didn’t go to prom because I was afraid my mother would insist on making my dress and she didn’t sew very well but she was super cheap. I refused to be embarrassed so the guy that asked me I ended up turning down and I felt bad for him because he didn’t know the real reason I did turn him down.

I am like every other female and yes I would like to have a beautiful wedding but I am more concerned with being happy and living happily ever after. I have no family to celebrate such an occasion so I seriously doubt that I will ever experience such an event. It wouldn’t break my heart if I were never to experience my own wedding because knowing that someone loves me enough to want to spend their life with me is enough for me.

I know I will one day meet someone problem will be with me for the remainder of my life and I know it will be the happiest years of my life as well. I just want someone to look at me and say that I look beautiful and I want that someone to be the man who I am committed to. I hope to be able to give my daughter a beautiful wedding but I do not know if that will ever be something I can give to her.

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