So you deleted your account that was on my facebook I assume because you are no longer reading every post the second it is posted. Why? Is what I write getting to you? Is it hitting home? Are you feeling compelled to make a move in your life to make yourself happy? You know what I write is true and you are feeling so dissatisfied with your life and you want a change.
I think you are scared and I think you feel as if I am persuading you to do things that you swore you never would do. You may not read everything immediately but you cannot help yourself now can you? I do not know what you are feeling but you are not wrong and you shouldn’t feel bad in the least bit. I do not believe in this day and age that two people are meant to marry young and stay together through out their lives.
You have become addicted to me and you are now trying to stop your obsession and by not reading what I write immediately is the first step. I feel for ya babe but you are fighting something that you are not meant to fight and I doubt that you will win in the end. You still think about me all of the time and you still get lost in thought thinking of me and you know it.
Remember when you played hide and seek as a kid? Remember when you had a tire hanging from a rope to swing on? Remember riding horses bareback? Remember swimming in the creek?Remember when you found morrel mushrooms in the woods? Remember as a child how carefree you were and how safe you always felt? No worries, no fears because you had never known what those feelings were like.
Now as adult you know what those feelings feel like and you know that you are never always safe in this life. You also know that taking a walk could be the last walk you ever take as you could be in the wrong place at the wrong time and you become a victim of time. You have to put a pet down or they get killed and you know what real pain is or at least you think you have experienced the most painful thing ever.
Then out of the blue someone you love gets sick, gets hit by a car, overdoses, who knows all we know is they die leaving us with a huge gaping hole in our soul. We begin to realize that we are mortal and no one lives forever. We begin to re-evaluate our lives and our relationships and we accept that we have lost the innocence we once had as a child. Life can be so great at times and it can also suck that much at other times. Why can’t we always feel safe, secure and loved?