Laughter In The Heart

Being Bipolar is a constant battle to stay positive and my emotions go up and down like a roller coaster anyway as my body has a connection with the moon as does yours. I notice that during a full moon I get depressed for several days and my friends know when there is a full moon on the horizon by the way I act.

It’s nothing a pill can cure or change, no it has nothing to do with chemical imbalance, it has to do with the gravitational pull and the effects the moon has on ebb and flow. It’s a good thing I no longer have a period as well, damn that would not be a good combination for someone, lol sorry guys.

I like to lean towards the positive when I can and have laughter in my heart. I like to get silly and stupid ass shit, just like a kid, that’s me and I will never grow up as to grow up is to grow old and I am not old. The kids across the street and I were playing the other day with the scarecrow and the pumpkins.

We rolled around in the leaves we raked up and I had leaves all through my hair but we had fun and laughing with the kids reminded of when mine were little and the fun we had. I love acting like a kid and laughing and being silly, it makes life worth living.

Have It

I try to fool myself into thinking that I have it together but the truth is I am so fucking scattered I do not know which direction to go any longer. If it isn’t one tragedy it’s another, it’s as if there is a black cloud over my head and I cannot lose it. I hate to say this, hell no I don’t I am looking forward to my son graduating and going off to college.

These kids have put me through hell and so has my family as they chose to drop like flys the last six years. I already know the next several years are going to be a bitch as Saturn is in my sign and sign is a teaching planet. When saturn affects you shit always goes bad so you can learn from it, aren’t I the lucky one.

It’s ok because I am getting prepared for my new life without my kids and frankly I am looking forward to it. I am a good mom but I can tell you to do over again, nope – I don’t like kids that much. I get along with them good but they are so emotionally draining I am worn out. I haven’t had any time to myself to process my husband’s or father’s deaths and I really need a break.

I’m thinking about taking a little vacation maybe Thanksgiving, it all depends on what is going on with Ry. What I would give for a week on a sandy beach and peace and quiet. What I would give for a nice bottle of wine and holding hands with someone in the evening breeze.

Perfect

It is a perfect time for my mystery man to meet me, yes it is indeed! Venus is in Cancer and Mars is in Scorpio, this equals a perfect time for two people to meet. There comes a time when you either have to dump or get off the pot so bucko, get off the pot.

I am a very desirable woman that is filled with love and you know it so if you keep waiting for the train, you are going to be waiting for it alone. I know you are getting a break for the holidays so be a bigger man than I am woman and come meet me.

I will be in Jackson of course and you just bring your sweet little tushie to me and let’s have a grown up talk, I know that is asking a lot to actually face me and communicate but it’s a new concept you might want to try out just for shits and giggles.

I know, I have actually said the boo word and scared your 45 year old butt into submission, now haven’t I? Come on I see you smiling because you know I am talking to you, ya you so get rid of that dumb look on your face and get your finger out of your rectum.

It doesn’t get any better than me, lmao now you know that I am the hottest, prettiest, sexiest, intelligent female you have ever  seen. You cannot keep your mind off me or off my pictures can you? See, I know what your dirty little mind is thinking, o yes I know only to well.

How would I know what is on your mind? Hon would you even dare to ask such a foolish question? Well, truth be known I am thinking the same thoughts you are, o yes I am. Come on impress me, please impress me will you? Come and visit me, now that would be so impressive.

Moon Thoughts

I looked at the moon

And thought of

You

And I 

Wondered

Were you looking

At the same 

Moon

Thinking of me 

To?

Will you ever 

Hold me in your

Arms

Or will someone else

Get me with their

Charms

You are willing to

Let me get

Away

Deny you love 

Me

Go ahead and

Try

But we both 

Know

That is your biggest

Lie

You want

Me

You need

Me

You cannot breathe without

Me

So why not

Be

With me?

Blue Moon?

Are you aware tomorrow nights full moon is a blue moon? A blue moon is a second moon in a month, which makes thirteen moons a year, which happens every couple of years. Read more about it at blue-moon-august-31-2012.

You may find the reading interesting and you may not but I certainly believe in the power of the moon and if you want to see the moon anytime let me know and I will drop them and bend over for you to kiss it, lmao.