So many people will say things like “I don’t care what you think or what you say” but the truth is those are always famous last words because those words are so far from the truth. When someone says those words what they are really saying is that they care very much but do not want the other person to know it. The fear of being rejected is so strong that people will say or do whatever they have to so they can protect their heart.
I think everyone cares what others think of them and some care too much and it really bothers them when someone thinks poorly of them. I for one used to care so much about someone but I have learned that I need to forget about that person and let them grow on their own. He is lonely and has a seriously sad heart but that is of his own doing and being rude and hateful to me isn’t going to change that.
He stays in a relationship because it would reflect poorly on him to get a divorce and no one in his family has ever walked down the road of divorce I bet. He isn’t mature enough for me and I will no longer allow him to hurt me emotionally with his immature and hateful behavior. I understand he feels trapped in his life and he wants to be with me if only to meet me but that is something that is just to scary for him to approach.
Im fine without him and always will be and I will continue to live my life doing the best I can and being the best person I can be. I am very giving and warm and I do enjoy helping others and donating my time to causes that touch me dearly. I do not do anything for attention or to make myself look good in others eyes and I do not have to impress anyone like he feels he does. I know longer believe we shall ever meet and really don’t care if I ever do meet him because he shows me nothing other than he is self absorbed.
He is going to have to learn to live without me because he refuses to take the step to meet me and I am not waiting for him any longer. I have taken a long hard look at my life and it doesn’t include him in any way shape or form. I am not angry any longer and I have just come to the point I just no longer care and it is simple as that. He can continue to finance his family’s adventures, and grab the lime light whenever he can because that is all he has which leaves him with an empty heart.