To Forget

How do you forget someone who has been part of your life for several years even though they may only have been standing on the sidelines? How do you come to terms with the fact that they will never be an active member in your life? Even though you have part of you that wants them out of your life there is another part that wants to desperately hang on to what little time you have shared.

Life has a way of throwing rocks thru our windshields and blurring our vision so we cannot or will not see what is in front of us. How do you reach out to this person and let them know that they have at times been your only saving grace? That without knowing that they watched over you in some strange way you would have felt adrift? It isn’t easy letting go and maybe we aren’t suppose to let go, maybe we are just waiting for the time to be right.

I tossed and turned all night thinking that “he” would erase me from his life but then the other half of my brain said “nope, he will never forget you because he cannot” and I did get some comfort from that thought. I know that I have something he hasn’t been able to find in another woman in a very long time and I know he misses that connection with another person.

There will come a time that instead of being two ships passing in the night we will be two ships side by side in the port. We will come together as one, one day and he can fight it all but he cannot deny it. He wants to be with me as I do him but the timing, well the timing is off but it is driving him to constant distraction and he cannot help what he feels nor can he forget me.