I learned long ago that most people will do things for you with either an expectation of wanting something in return or need validation. I have always told those that have helped me “thank you”.
I have also found that when someone helps you more likely than not they need to feel important in your life. They need to hear you say thank you over and over to make them feel appreciated.
Those that are secure within themselves only need to hear “thank you” once as they “get it”, they do not need a constant reminder. They dont need to be stroked over and over and for one, I find that quite annoying.
After many years, I thought I found someone who really wanted to be my friend. How wrong I was as this man thought we were destine to be together.
What he failed to realize is A. He is married, B. He lives 2 hours away, C. The attraction is purely bdsm and nothing more. He wants a vanilla relationship that has aspects of the bdsm world.
He has reminded me numerous times of the things he has done or given me. He has tried to “guilt trip” me into making a place for him in my life. He wants more than to be a sub but that my dear will never happen.
When you do something for someone it should come from the heart, without strings attached. You should never expect something in return when you do for another.
I refuse to have any part in breaking up a marriage and I will never be with anyone that divorces to be with me. I can have bdsm relationships that are non sexual and no I never will get sexually involved.
I will not “fondle” anyone when we are in the same bed. Fondling is a form of foreplay which is a preclude to sex. I will never have sex with anyone that is my sub or slave.
As far as helping me, I don’t really care if someone does or doesnt. They will be in my life if I chose and not for what they do or give me. If you have to be reminded constantly about how I feel about you, well forget it I refuse to stroke you over and over.